Lonely Christmas

I sit here, now alone, on the cold wooden floor

Looking up at the Christmas tree

Like I used to do as a child on these howling nights.

Its flashing lights and snow white angel

Stare back down at me.

Red, green, blue, and silver

My eyes water from not blinking.

They start to blur and remind me of a long time ago.

A glittery tear drops from my eye

As my memory goes back to when my sister was alive.

We would sleep under the huge, tilted tree

Laughing, telling stories, refusing to sleep.

Our stomachs were filled with butterflies in hopes

That we would see a glimpse of him in the shadows on the wall.

The pasty moon peeked through our window

Past the tree and down our giggling bodies,

The wailing wind blew whining noises under the front door

But together…

We were never afraid.

Then late into the night, our eyes would give up

And we would fall asleep, hand in hand waiting

Waiting, waiting for a thump, a clatter, a jingle.

Then the morning would come.

Oh how I miss her; Christmas Eve just isn’t the same.

So I lay here on the cold foor, alone, and blinking lights

Blanket my body as my hands remain open

Hoping, hoping, hoping to feel her hand in mine,

Again.